God

First things First

            This is by no means the simplest thing I have ever done but I will say one of the best things concerning my relationship with the Creator of the universe and Killer of sin.  Hey, I figured I owed Them at the very least my consideration.  So early one morning about four o’clock AM I rose but not after griping first about the hour I decided in order to keep from falling back to sleep I should speak out loudly.  The house was dark, quiet and frankly I felt like a fool talking out loudly to what I thought was God but really not God, you know what I mean.  God is real we all know this but not like, just stopped by for a conversation is there any coffee left, real.  Those ways we all know to be Old Testament days.  Anyway it was either feel like a fool or go back to bed and I knew this wasn’t an option. So I asked what I believed to be a pretty straight forward question.  What’s the best way to get to know you God?  Now this is (what I would soon come to know as), one of the many great parts about God; He is a show me God.  He doesn’t waste time with a bunch of words and useless dialogue (unlike me) and He definitely doesn’t play games either, His reply, simple.  “Let go of all of the preconceived notions you have built about me for the past thirty some odd years because they are false and man-made.”  This is when God decided to show up.  Why now I never asked, I guess this is what He wanted from me all along, conversation.  He just appeared to me and not the white haired ancient type I wrote about in Libretto as Hapsom.  Not as a character at all but the true reality of who God is to me; wisdom and love and sacrifice, the real God. Not the proverbial archetype that demands the above mentioned ‘things,’ the God, not a god, much different.  He knew what I was about to ask next of course He did.  Why had I waited so long to reach out to Him?  Why had I wasted so many years being stubbornly angry for one reason or another?  “Self loathing,” He gently replied “and…you chose it.  Actually it is an occupational hazard because of the close proximity you live to sin.  People who hate Me and My Son hate themselves and the same goes with the opposite.  Remember this please; I am not religion though people say I am.  I am not the church though people say that as well.  I am you and you me, make your choices based on this from now on and you’ll begin to see the difference.”  That was the first time God appeared to me and the last time I complained about having to get up at four AM.